*having recession outside

I am seriously considering doing a Paypal currency scam.

Two Open Letters

Dear Young Men at the Cherry Festival,

The Primary Reason to wear fitting pants is so you don't look like a D-Bag hitching them up behind Diana Fairbanks on 7&4.


Dear American Civil Liberties Union,

The Ass-crack is not covered under the First Amendment.

MoQ 1: Bling

It already sounds infantile and cartoonish.  Bling are basically accessories—which are bourgeois enough—with a 21st century twist.  Where many accessories now must have a purpose: the iPod plays media, a mobile phone takes pictures; bling's purpose is to flaunt its uselessness.

That is, a person with bling is showing that they have money and therefore can choose to look cartoonish and infantile.  So now, I believe we can all say without irony: Flava Flav is the bourgiest mothafucka on the planet. (Venus and Serena are allowed (but would I be saying anything different if they weren't so talented?) their very tasteful earrings.)

And it isn't a Black thing.  Anyone willing to flaunt their uselessness on Vh1, Mtv (and BET) can wear bling.  (Remember when New Money used to be an insult? You don't but just go with it.) But I would like to point out that 50 Cent and Li'l Kim can jive up their grills but Paris Hilton only has to do her Blackberry to bling herself.  What would bell hooks say?

It knows not pride or vanity

This is a Web 2.0 project; I want it to be an interactive, multimedia experience.  For this, I will require a population of many talents and vocations.  Therefore, I will use the social networking tools LiveJournal and FaceBook and perhaps expand afterward. 

He sang his didn't he danced his did

The American narrative has become self-centered and fetishized, flat like Melville prose.  We are cynical and jaded or, we are just plain vacuous.  We have become disinterested in progress (sorry, Obama supporters, Change is not necessarily progress; please refer to WALL·E's Axiom for an example). 

Lethargy only breeds lethargy—it's still the same, just like a cancer.  Lethargy keeps Joe Francis in business, is responsible for Shreks 2 and the 3rd, allows Mormonism to exist and makes methamphetamine production seem like a viable source of income.  It also allows a fireworks shop, a gas station and a hotel to be within the same one one mile radius (I saw this somewhere in the South ten years ago) which can only be described as New Sincerity gone wrong. 

Roland Barthes could have never imagined Girls Gone Wild (thank God!) and it is only Gordon Ramsay (on a FOX reality show!) who gives me hope for Good Taste.  (I'm also enjoying Swingtown, so I probably can't be trusted to give an opinion on Taste.)  If all else fails, just read some Nabokov.